My BCBA Is Recommending 30+ Hours, and I Don’t Agree (What Can I Do?)

Aug 25

8 min read

You’re starting ABA, or reassessing your child’s plan, and your BCBA now recommends

30, 35, even 40 hours per week. Your first thought?

“That feels like way too much.”

You're not alone. Many Bay Area families, including those we support in San Francisco, Oakland, and Berkeley, push back against intensive schedules that feel unsustainable. At Celeration ABA, we believe more isn’t always better. What matters most is a schedule that supports growth without burning out your child or your family. Remember, ABA therapy schedule concerns are valid.

Here’s what to know, the logic behind the recommended ABA therapy hours, how to speak up, and what real options work, so you can get clear, centered, and move forward confidently.

How Many Hours of ABA Is Too Much?

Yes, research points to 30+ hours of ABA therapy for the strongest gains in early intervention but those numbers are guidelines, not mandates.

What matters in ABA therapy for toddlers is the balance between:

Your child’s age and attention
Their emotional regulation and energy levels
Your family’s capacity to manage appointments, school, and downtime

A 5-year-old in TK with speech and OT, plus a nonstop therapy schedule, can quickly burn out. If your gut says it's too much? Listen to it. It's not a refusal. It’s informed parenting.

Why BCBAs Recommend 30+ Hours and Why That Doesn’t Have to Define Your Case

That 30–40-hour figure comes from the lab, where therapy is a full-time job. In practice, so many of our Bay Area families layer therapy on top of preschool, sports, naps, and after-school activities.

At Celeration ABA, we honor the research but we lead with real life. A sustainable schedule is one your child can engage with consistently and one your family can manage without losing connection or sanity.

Signs Your Child Is Burning Out from Too Much Therapy

When therapy is no longer helpful, it’s obvious and it’s worth acting on fast. Here are some signs that shows your child is experiencing ABA therapy burnout.

Clinginess or behavior regressions
Resistance to the therapist
Meltdowns before or after sessions
Sleep regression or loss of interest in favorite activities

One Bay Area family reported no progress after weeks of uphill battles. We paused to cut the schedule back by half. Their son regained calm and regained engagement. That’s not regression, it’s redirection.

Sustainable Progress > Heavy Hours

Your child’s brain and their rest, need space to grow. Over-scheduling kids leads to exhaustion, not transformation.

We’ve seen kids thrive with 15–20 hours per week, while others struggled on 35. Both can make progress, if the plan aligns with their needs and energy rhythm. That’s what sustainability looks like.

How to Advocate for Your Child in ABA

So, how to advocate for your child in ABA. Here’s a confident, respectful script:

“Help me understand why 35 hours is best right now.”
“We’re seeing fatigue, what if we try 25 hours and measure progress?”
“Goal #1, #2, #3, can we stem the hours until those are solid?”

Come with data (behaviors, mood, videos). Keep it factual. Offer alternatives. Most BCBAs, especially here, want solutions, not apologies.

Balancing BCBA Recommendations vs Parent Choice

It isn’t a competition. It’s teamwork. You bring real-life context. We bring expertise. For example, a team member once negotiated a 20-hour plan that included 5 hours of weekly parent coaching. The child exceeded early expectations and parents reported less stress and more confidence.

That’s how we build plans here, with both expertise and lived experience.

Still Feeling Pressured?

If you’re still feeling guilt-tripped, dismissed, or edged out:

Ask for a written plan and rationale
Request a formal review process
Bring a friend to your next meeting
Ask for a second opinion

If your BCBA dismisses this, that’s a red flag. Great providers don’t guilt-trap parents. They listen.

When Your BCBA Says “No” to Change

If you're not seen, heard, or respected, that’s a problem. You can:

Ask for a session with the clinical director
Request a written rationale for the full schedule
Bring another BCBA or parent advocate into the conversation
As a last step, switch providers, if collaboration isn’t possible

There are plenty of best ABA providers in the Bay Area who value parent-led, flexible approaches. You deserve a team that collaborates, not coerces.

You Have the Right to Say No

Parents hold real power here. You can:

Ask for fewer or shorter sessions
Swap for parent-coaching blocks instead
Request schedule changes, even a second opinion

Parent rights in ABA therapy aren’t suggestions, they’re fundamental. Advocating for your child doesn’t mean you’re questioning your BCBA’s expertise. It means you’re taking responsibility, and any good provider will respect that.

You’re Not the Only Parent Saying "Not 40 Hours"

Parents across San Francisco, Oakland, Berkeley, and San Jose are opting out of overwhelming schedules, and yes, their kids are still making big progress. Social media, parent groups, and support forums here show that your hesitation isn’t rare, it’s wise.

Celeration ABA's Approach: Where Flexibility Meets Expertise

1. Discovery + Pilot: Start Soft, Test Strong

Celeration ABA offers a discovery call first, zero pressure, total focus on you. From there, a pilot week with 5–10 hours helps you feel whether strategies anchor well. No guessing.

2. Data-Driven, But Family-Lived

Yes, we collect data, but we don’t live by the number of data points. We look for momentum. We stop, shift, and adjust based on what the family reports. We’re local, we’re nimble, and we keep routines first.

3. Monthly Family Check-Ins

Unlike some distant clinics, we talk once a month, not just review progress, but talk life. Did the schedule change? Did a sibling have needs? Did summer travel come up? We adjust to fit you.

4. Evening/Weekend Options

We know Bay Area families navigate commuting and tech-heavy days. Celeration ABA offers weekend or evening slots.

How Progress Is Measured

Instead of “data” we look at:

Can your child ask for help at home 80% of the time?
Are meltdowns fewer, shorter, and easier to manage?
Is your daily routine calmer, more predictable?
Is there room for unstructured play and joy?

Numbers matter, but life flow matters more.

Flexible ABA Therapy Options That Work in the Bay Area

Your options go far beyond rigid schedules. We support models like:

Shorter, focused sessions with regular parent coaching
Telehealth check-ins for generalization, between in-person sessions
Seasonal dips (like lighter summer schedules)
Skill integration therapy during school snack time or during bath
Parent-led Bootcamps that you can do before or after work

These flexible ABA therapy options deliver results, even with fewer hours.

Real Bay Area Stories: Finding Balance in Everyday Life

Kensington Family: Starting Small in a Busy World

Sarah and her husband, both working in SF, felt squeezed when their 4-year-old’s BCBA recommended 32 hours per week. With school, commuting, and family time, it wasn’t sustainable. They began with 10 hours of in-home ABA, focusing on morning routines and speech. After a month, they added a weekly 2-hour center-based playgroup at a Berkeley clinic. The result? Their son retained progress, felt calm, and the family breathed easier. As Sarah puts it: “We’re not doing it all, we’re doing what matters. And he’s thriving."

South San Jose: One Family’s Hybrid Win

The Ramos family started with 20 hours of in-home ABA therapy at 3 years old. When their child turned 5 and entered transitional kindergarten, they added center-based small-group social skills (3 kids max). It was life-changing: peer play became smoother, transitions became easier, and they still kept their core in-home support. They tell us: “It’s a rhythm that works for us, not a checklist.”

Marin Mom’s Mind Shift

When the Smiths started ABA for their 2-year-old, they felt obligated to say yes to everything. After a few weeks, therapy felt robotic, too many sessions, too many hours, and not enough family time. They called a Celeration ABA consultant, communicated their limits, and cut back to 15 hours with weekly parent coaching. The result: more connection, more smiles, and measurable progress.

Final Take

There’s no magic number of hours. It’s about alignment, between your child’s readiness, your family's life, and goals that feel meaningful.

You aren’t denying therapy by saying “this feels like too much.” You’re demanding quality. That’s dedication, not defiance.

At Celeration ABA, we’re here to help you build a plan that honors your child, your family, and your values. We're not chasing hours. We’re building lives.

Ready to Talk?

If you’re feeling stuck in a plan that doesn’t reflect your life, or overwhelmed by a number that feels too big, reach out to Celeration ABA.

Here’s how to start:

Book a 30-minute Discovery Call — no pressure, just clarity.
Try a manageable pilot — 5–15 hours a week to start.
Review progress monthly and test for rhythm, not just reports.
Adapt, adjust, or shift — as your child grows and your life changes.

We start with a conversation, about your concerns, your child, and what feels in reach.

Because real progress isn’t about lasting the longest, it’s about growing, resting, connecting, and showing up week after week.

Let’s build something sustainable, together.

FAQs About My BCBA Is Recommending 30+ Hours, and I Don’t Agree (What Can I Do?)

1. Is 30+ hours a week always necessary for ABA?

No. While some research supports intensive therapy, often 30 to 40 hours a week, those numbers were based on specific clinical studies, not individualized family life. Many children make meaningful progress with fewer hours, especially when therapy is well-designed, consistent, and developmentally appropriate.

2. What if my child resists sessions or seems exhausted?

This could be your child communicating overwhelm or burnout. If your child is regularly resisting sessions, seems unusually tired, or starts having more meltdowns or behavioral regressions, it may be a sign the schedule is too demanding. Share these patterns with your BCBA. A good clinical team will look at what’s happening during sessions and help adjust the plan.

3. Can I legally decline the suggested hours?

Yes, absolutely. As a parent or guardian, you have the right to accept, modify, or decline parts of a therapy plan based on what’s best for your child and your family’s needs.

4. What are red flags that ABA therapy for toddlers is too much?

Red flags can look different for each child, but some common signs include: increased tantrums or meltdowns, emotional shutdown, avoidance of therapists, disrupted sleep patterns, physical complaints (like headaches or stomach aches), or withdrawing from play and family activities. If your child no longer seems to enjoy activities they used to love, or you’re seeing signs of fatigue and frustration more often than not, it may be time to rethink the schedule and approach.

5. Can I ask to start with fewer hours and increase later?

Yes, definitely. In fact, many families in the Bay Area choose to begin with a lower number of hours, say, 10 to 15, to see how their child adapts, then gradually increase if it feels right. This allows time for your child to build trust with the therapy team, and for you to observe what’s working.

6. Will my child fall behind with fewer hours?

Progress in ABA is not just about how many hours are delivered, it’s about the quality of the interaction, the skill of the therapist, the child’s readiness, and the environment in which therapy occurs. A child who is calm, engaged, and supported in a 15-hour plan may learn more than a child who’s overwhelmed in a 30-hour plan.

7. How can I talk to my BCBA about my concerns?

Be honest and direct. Start by saying something like, “I’ve been thinking a lot about the schedule and how my child is responding. Right now, it feels like too much. Can we look at some alternatives?” A strong BCBA will not be offended, they will welcome the chance to collaborate and create a plan that actually works.

8. What if my BCBA doesn’t seem open to changes?

That’s a serious concern. If you feel unheard, dismissed, or pressured into agreeing to hours that don’t feel right, you’re allowed to seek another perspective. You can ask to speak with the clinical supervisor or director, or even look for another provider who values collaborative care.

9. Are there flexible ABA providers in the Bay Area?

Yes. There are providers who understand that therapy has to fit your life, not the other way around. Celeration ABA, for example, works with families in Oakland, San Francisco, and San Mateo to create schedules that feel human. We offer options like parent coaching, session flexibility around naps and preschool, and support for integrating therapy into everyday routines. Whether it’s meeting you at the park or working around a sibling’s soccer schedule, we believe flexibility leads to better outcomes.

10. Is it okay to say no to parts of a therapy plan?

Yes, you can. If there’s a part of the plan that doesn’t sit well with you, whether it’s the number of hours, certain goals, or the time of day, you can say no or ask for changes. You know your child best.